Some XL Thoughts
Another week come and gone. Have some random items on the agenda for this post. Let's get to it.
- So I have now it straight in my mind that if the groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, sees his shadow, that means we're in for 6 more weeks of winter. As I mentioned yesterday, if that 6 more weeks of winter is anything like the past couple of weeks, I think we're all fine with that. Anyway, Julie passed on an article about the happenings at Gobbler's Knob in Punxsutawney, PA. I find two things to be suspicious about this whole groundhog nonsense. First, the quote, "Despite overcast skies, Phil was declared to have seen [his shadow]." That's a load of garbage. If it's cloudy, how did he see his shadow? And how do these clowns know what the groundhog did or did not see? The more I think about it, I find this whole annual extravaganza to be a hoax. Secondly, Punxsutawney Phil is now a Steelers' fan. I didn't see any Terrible Towels in other years. Could Phil be jumping on the bandwagon? Something fishy is going on.
- Speaking of the Steelers, I have to rip on them one more time before they win the Super Bowl on Sunday. After that, I can't rip on them until at least the beginning of next season, so I have to get my shots in while I can. Come to think of it, I'm not actually ripping on them, but my guy Bill Simmons is. Who's he calling out? Jerome Bettis? He wouldn't dare!
"After Tuesday's Cowbell, [RPR note: reference middle of that column, and then come bck to these comments] some Pittsburgh fans/readers pointed out that Bettis struggled in Denver because his asthma always kicks up in the high altitude. First, I have asthma, so I don't need to be lectured about it -- there's a thing called "an inhaler" that protects athletes from having asthma attacks when they play sports. I know this because I use one whenever I play any sport. So does anyone who suffers from asthma. Second, Bettis had 5 carries in the first half and 15 carries overall in Denver -- this wasn't exactly one of those 42-carry games out of the Earl Campbell Playbook. Third, and most importantly, he's noticeably overweight for a professional athlete (much less someone playing a skill position in the NFL). This is why he needed an oxygen mask in the second half. Jerome Bettis is very, very heavy. He's extremely large. When large people exert themselves physically, they tend to have trouble breathing and keeping their body at a normal temperature, as we found out during every Blues Travelers concert in the early-90's. If you suffer from asthma and playing in thin air, carrying extra weight makes any breathing problems you may have had about 10-20 times worse.
The bigger issue: He's a professional athlete, which means he only has three jobs: Show up on time, listen to his coach, stay in shape. Because he's a great guy who happens to be retiring after the season, these facts obscure the fact that he's not even remotely in shape anymore. For example, what if Super Bowl XL goes into overtime and the Bus can't play anymore because he's laboring like Chris Farley at the tail end of the Chippendale's sketch, so Cowher has to use Verron Hayes on a 3rd-and-short? Would this be acceptable? Or should we overlook it because he's a good guy? You tell me."
- So I have now it straight in my mind that if the groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, sees his shadow, that means we're in for 6 more weeks of winter. As I mentioned yesterday, if that 6 more weeks of winter is anything like the past couple of weeks, I think we're all fine with that. Anyway, Julie passed on an article about the happenings at Gobbler's Knob in Punxsutawney, PA. I find two things to be suspicious about this whole groundhog nonsense. First, the quote, "Despite overcast skies, Phil was declared to have seen [his shadow]." That's a load of garbage. If it's cloudy, how did he see his shadow? And how do these clowns know what the groundhog did or did not see? The more I think about it, I find this whole annual extravaganza to be a hoax. Secondly, Punxsutawney Phil is now a Steelers' fan. I didn't see any Terrible Towels in other years. Could Phil be jumping on the bandwagon? Something fishy is going on.
- Speaking of the Steelers, I have to rip on them one more time before they win the Super Bowl on Sunday. After that, I can't rip on them until at least the beginning of next season, so I have to get my shots in while I can. Come to think of it, I'm not actually ripping on them, but my guy Bill Simmons is. Who's he calling out? Jerome Bettis? He wouldn't dare!
"After Tuesday's Cowbell, [RPR note: reference middle of that column, and then come bck to these comments] some Pittsburgh fans/readers pointed out that Bettis struggled in Denver because his asthma always kicks up in the high altitude. First, I have asthma, so I don't need to be lectured about it -- there's a thing called "an inhaler" that protects athletes from having asthma attacks when they play sports. I know this because I use one whenever I play any sport. So does anyone who suffers from asthma. Second, Bettis had 5 carries in the first half and 15 carries overall in Denver -- this wasn't exactly one of those 42-carry games out of the Earl Campbell Playbook. Third, and most importantly, he's noticeably overweight for a professional athlete (much less someone playing a skill position in the NFL). This is why he needed an oxygen mask in the second half. Jerome Bettis is very, very heavy. He's extremely large. When large people exert themselves physically, they tend to have trouble breathing and keeping their body at a normal temperature, as we found out during every Blues Travelers concert in the early-90's. If you suffer from asthma and playing in thin air, carrying extra weight makes any breathing problems you may have had about 10-20 times worse.
The bigger issue: He's a professional athlete, which means he only has three jobs: Show up on time, listen to his coach, stay in shape. Because he's a great guy who happens to be retiring after the season, these facts obscure the fact that he's not even remotely in shape anymore. For example, what if Super Bowl XL goes into overtime and the Bus can't play anymore because he's laboring like Chris Farley at the tail end of the Chippendale's sketch, so Cowher has to use Verron Hayes on a 3rd-and-short? Would this be acceptable? Or should we overlook it because he's a good guy? You tell me."
Valid points all around. Leave it to Bill Simmons to go against the grain. Of course, he's probably getting his last shots in to, since everyone knows the Steelers are going to win...
- Continuing on the Super Bowl XL kick, let's talk about the commercials. We all love the commercials, and I'd bet that many people who watch the game see it as commercials that are interrupted by a football game. It's nice to get the early scoop on what to expect from these companies that shell out $2.5 million for 30 seconds of the most prime airtime know to mankind. It doesn't come as much of a surprise that Budweiser, Burger King, and CareerBuilder.com are supposed to come up with some quality broadcast advertising, and you can read a little more about it here. As Eric once proclaimed, the best commercials you can make involve either midgets or monkeys. You throw both into one commercial, and you're golden. Let's hope the companies follow that advice.
- On a side note, I question those automatic sinks in the public bathrooms....you know, the ones where you press the button and only receive about 4 seconds worth of water? I need to start a petition to get companies, restaurants, store owners, and the like, to extend the amount of time that the public bathroom goers are given to wash their hands per press of the faucet. How can I possibly press the button, rub in the soap, and rinse in 4 seconds? Impossible. I'd like to get ahold of someone and say, "Hey, can you fix the setting to give me at least 10 seconds worth of water? I promise the water won't be left running and be wasted. I ensure you that I will actually be utilizing it. Thank you." Again, folks, I bring up real life situations for real life people like you and I who are more in touch with reality than others.
- I'm heading to the Philadelphia this weekend to see my parents, and then back up here to watch Super Bowl XL on Sunday evening. Enjoy the weekend, and check back on Tuesday for an update, as I may not get a chance to do any blogging for Monday.
posted by The Ross @ 12:07 AM
1 comments
1 Comments:
I think the petition on automatic sinks should include the auto dryers as well...nobody can ever really dry their hands with those things...they are a complete joke!
-Reza
Post a Comment
<< Home